Women's Money Wisdom

Episode 197: Understanding and Overcoming the Emotional Triggers of Overspending with Paige Pritchard

• Paige Prichard • Season 4 • Episode 197

Share episode

In this episode, hosted by Melissa Fradenburg, we explore Paige Pritchard's remarkable transformation from an impulsive shopper to a financially savvy individual. By age 29, Paige had achieved notable financial milestones: she paid off $40,000 in student loan debt, cash-flowed her MBA, became a homeowner, and built a substantial six-figure investment portfolio. As a certified life coach, she has empowered thousands of women to improve their spending habits through various platforms, including her social channels, The Money Love Podcast, and her group coaching membership, Overcoming Overspending.

Paige divulges her three-phase approach to money management, underscoring the pivotal role of mindset and emotions in financial decision-making. She provides an in-depth look at the emotional triggers that often lead to overspending, alongside proposing healthier coping strategies. A significant focus is placed on the impact of social media on spending habits. Paige offers valuable insights on how social media can instigate detrimental spending mindsets and provides strategies to counteract these influences.

The episode also delves into the concept of "spending self-concept," where Paige discusses how our mental and emotional states can drastically affect our spending choices. This discussion goes beyond mere financial advice; it's a journey of self-discovery, enriched with personal stories and practical tips designed to transform your relationship with money. Join us in this empowering episode as we learn to overcome the lure of overspending and embark on a path to financial health and freedom.

Resources: 

The previous presentation by PEARL PLANNING was intended for general information purposes only. No portion of the presentation serves as the receipt of, or as a substitute for, personalized investment advice from PEARL PLANNING or any other investment professional of your choosing. Different types of investments involve varying degrees of risk, and it should not be assumed that future performance of any specific investment or investment strategy, or any non-investment related or planning services, discussion or content, will be profitable, be suitable for your portfolio or individual situation, or prove successful. Neither PEARL PLANNING’s investment adviser registration status, nor any amount of prior experience or success, should be construed that a certain level of results or satisfaction will be achieved if PEARL PLANNING is engaged, or continues to be engaged, to provide investment advisory services. PEARL PLANNING is neither a law firm nor accounting firm, and no portion of its services should be construed as legal or accounting advice. No portion of the video content should be construed by a client or prospective client as a guarantee that he/she will experience a certain level of results if PEARL PLANNING is engaged, or continues to be engaged, to provide investment advisory services. A copy of PEARL PLANNING’s current written disclosure Brochure discussing our advisory services and fees is available upon request or at https://pearlplan.com/

Speaker 1:

You.

Speaker 2:

Hello and welcome to the Women's Money Wisdom podcast. This is Melissa Freidenberg, and this week our guest is Paige Pritchard. She is a spending coach who helps women stop impulse shopping and overspending. She discovered her passion for helping women develop healthier spending habits through her own personal struggles with impulse shopping at age 20. Hello, Hi, how are you? I'm early.

Speaker 2:

That's okay, I was actually just running through. First of all, thank you. You are the most prepared podcast guest I've ever had. So the fact that you like wrote, like, have this all written out, I just love it so no, I was just trying to get my tongue ties out.

Speaker 1:

No, honestly, take your time truly.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, I I've been looking forward to this. I'm so excited. I edit all of our own podcasts. I see you have a podcast, so you know what that involves. But I say that from a point of, like, I have lots of arms and Oz. I don't like the way I sound sometimes, so I edit everything. So if there's anything you say, just kind of pop in and edit and say it a different way and I'll make sure to make it sound the way you want.

Speaker 1:

Perfect. I still edit my own podcast too, so I feel you on that, yes, so you know that like that.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yes, yes, yes, such a process I also do have any kids?

Speaker 1:

I do. I have one daughter she's she's 18 months, so she's she's still pretty little.

Speaker 2:

But yeah, one daughter, that's such a great age.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, she's, she's like getting to like get a little personality and stuff. So it's been really it's been really fun so fun.

Speaker 2:

Well, yeah, I have two, and one of mine is home with the stomach bug, so I'm recording in my house, which is why you see like a dresser in the background, and then in my home office, where I was working all day until about 1230, it was very quiet, and then the neighbors have like a yard cleanup, so I just hear like the gas. So I was like, forget it, I'm just going to sit in my bedroom and record this.

Speaker 1:

So no, you're totally fine. And I will warn you, I have two dogs and they're normally pretty good, but in the off chance that like we get like a package or my front door is like right here, so they can always see like when we get up. So if they start like barking or whatever, I'll just stop and wait for them to come down and then we'll keep going. I have this warning, so all of a sudden you're not like oh my God, what is that?

Speaker 2:

No, it makes me feel better because, like I said, I usually try to record podcasts in the office. For that reason I have a dog. I put the dog in with my sixth son and was like keep him from barking for the next hour, please, yeah yeah, you're in Michigan, aren't? You.

Speaker 1:

I'm in Gross Point, Michigan, Okay, yeah, my husband grew up in Novi, Okay, and we lived. Well, we lived. I we're in Texas now, which is where I grew up, but I lived in Michigan with him for about five years. Yeah, I got my little Michigan mug. Oh, wow, I love that. Yeah, I know. So yeah, we, I lived in Michigan for about five years. We lived in Novi for like the first year and a half and then we lived in Canton, kind of like right by the IKEA.

Speaker 1:

Oh, I know that IKEA, oh I know everyone does, it's the only one in Michigan. Everyone's like oh, yeah, I know the IKEA. Yeah, I saw you guys were in Gross Point and so I was like, oh, that's so fun.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, our main office is in Dexter, which is closer to the IKEA there, kind of outside of Ann Arbor, and then my office was actually remote from that office even before COVID. But it worked out well because I was already like my assistant's in Dexter, so like everything was remote, so it was pretty seamless when we had to go remote for the world.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know that's so fun, so yeah, and that's exciting that you have that Michigan connection.

Speaker 2:

I didn't know it. I was following your podcast. I'm not really on TikTok, like I can't be on TikTok just because of our regulations. They don't allow us to be.

Speaker 1:

Oh, okay, yeah.

Speaker 2:

I have it on my phone. Don't tell my husband because he's always like paranoid about it. I saw, I think I saw you first on TikTok and then Instagram, and, truth be told, I'm going to boot this up, like with the podcast, but I struggle with this myself, and so often when I'm doing financial plans for people, whether they make a million dollars a year or 50,000 a year, there's overspending.

Speaker 1:

It's a huge problem. Yeah, it is.

Speaker 2:

There are men that overspend, but our focus is obviously the women's money wisdom podcast is women. I've let a female clients and one of the things we do is helping women after divorce that maybe never had to like budget, didn't do the finances. We're teaching them for the first time like okay, like this is your budget, this is what you can spend and I see people struggle with this, you know, all the time.

Speaker 2:

So, outside of even this podcast, I probably would have some referrals for you because this you know, I focus more on the investing portion and retirement.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So the day to day stuff is like hey, I still struggle when I go into TJ Maxx, so like I'm not necessarily like the right coach for you on this, so I know it's a big issue.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, you're, you're, you're so right. It's just like it's like one of the silos of money that I think, like people, it's such like a huge issue for people, but I think it's like one of the silos that, like, we don't really focus on a whole lot because we think like, oh, you just like, you just like spend, like it's just, you know you make money and you spend it Like we just kind of view it that way. We don't actually view it as like, like there's actually like skill and intention that goes behind it. So, but, yeah, I mean, it's just, you're, you're absolutely right. It's like, no matter what income you're at, 50,000 or a million, it's like people, people struggle with this.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, it doesn't discriminate. And I do think, it's a little bit harder for women, but we'll get into that. Let's just have a conversation. I'm going to boot it up real quick. Richard, is that the right way to say your lesson?

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

Okay, I always ask, because every once in a while I'm like stomp five more and they're like no, no, don't pronounce my name.

Speaker 1:

Nope, you got it, that's right.

Speaker 2:

All right, all right. So I'm going to just boot this up, is it okay? I may go back and feather in some more. I might leave. I might shorten your intro a little bit, that's fine.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, I mean just shorten it, even if you just I mean whatever you want to say and whatever you want to touch on, even if you just record it later, that's totally fine, I don't care.

Speaker 2:

Okay, I may go in and do that, but I'm just going to kind of give it some structure, yeah, and then I'll go feather in what I need to, Okay, so that's good.

Speaker 2:

Hello and welcome to the women's money wisdom podcast. This is Melissa Freidenberg, and this week, our guest is Paige Pritchard. She is a spending coach who helps women stop impulse shopping and overspending. Paige discovered her passion for helping women develop healthier spending habits through her own personal struggles with impulse shopping. By uncovering the root cause of her shopping and making a commitment to develop healthier spending habits, she was able to turn around her financial situation in her 20s and now well edit. In 2020, paige became a certified life coach through the Life Coach School and then and has coached my gosh and has coached thousands of women to become better spenders and reach their full financial potential through her social media channels, her podcast called the Money Love Podcast, and group coaching membership overcoming overspending. Paige, I am so excited that you are here today with us. I'm a huge fan of your Instagram page and I know our guests are just going to love you. So welcome to the women's money wisdom podcast.

Speaker 1:

Thanks, Melissa. I'm really excited to be here and to talk to you.

Speaker 2:

Well, we're excited to have you here and, as I mentioned, sort of off the record, I personally struggle with this myself. Obviously, as a financial planner, my job is to help other women, you know, kind of get their budget and our controls a small, small portion of it. But I see this across the board. Whether people are making 50,000 a year or 100,000 a year, lots of men and women are overspending. So this is not an area that I focus on in my practice, but and I don't think a lot of people are focusing on this necessarily as coaches You're the only one that I know of, so yeah, yeah, there's a truly.

Speaker 1:

There's not many of us out here that are so you're right about that.

Speaker 2:

It's such an important need. So, before we get into what you do, could you share a little bit about how you got started? I know I mentioned in the intro, but what inspired you to do this?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I I honestly do what I do today. It's very autobiographical and, like you said in the intro, I have experienced my own struggles with impulse shopping, overspending At one point in time. I really do kind of classify my past self as a full blown compulsive shopper, and it started in my younger 20s. It really did start after I graduated from college and I'm 34. So I'm a millennial, I'm an older millennial but still a millennial nonetheless. But I graduated from college and, like most millennials, I had student loan debt. I had 40 grand of student loan debt. I had no savings and actually the highest job offer that I got out of undergrad was to go work at a car dealership and sell cars. They offered to pay me $60,000 a year and it was a Cadillac dealership. So they're like we'll give you a Cadillac to drive and we'll pay for the gas and the insurance and your cell phone bill, which that sounded great to me. So I was like sure.

Speaker 2:

That sounded like my first job.

Speaker 1:

So I was like, okay, let's go, let's go sell Cadillacs. So went and did that and that job was in the Dallas, Texas area, which is where I grew up. And so I kind of like struck this deal with my parents to say like, hey, listen, I'm coming back to Dallas. Can I live with you for a year? I'm going to be making great money, you know. Can you know? This would be a really good opportunity for me to keep my expenses really, really low so I can make a dent in these student loans and actually build up some savings. And my parents graciously said like, yeah, sure, no problem, We'll allow you to do that for a year.

Speaker 1:

And really this period of time this year that could have been this time where I was building a really solid financial foundation for myself that's exactly like the opposite of that ended up happening. I remember going to like up to the mall in Dallas and spending my entire first paycheck on a new wardrobe and I remember thinking like, okay, that's it, I'm done, Like I'm not going to spend any more money. I got some good staple pieces, Like that's it. But I remember like the euphoria that I felt on that trip and I think that was the first time in my life that I had ever had money. I mean I call it like a literal zero to 60.

Speaker 1:

It was like going from having maybe no more than $20 in my bank account to earning a $60,000 salary, and I do think a big part of it was just like I was able to go buy things and shop in places that I had never been able to afford previously. It just it boosted my ego and it felt really good and in combination with that as well, I would say like the first probably three or four months after starting that job, just starting to go through a lot of and experience a lot of negative emotion, Right Like I did not handle the transition from having independence to moving back in with my parents and I really missed my friends from college and me and my college boyfriend broke up, and so at the time it was like there's some grace that most 20 somethings don't have good financial responsibility, and you also didn't have bills because you were doing the responsible thing of staying with your parents.

Speaker 2:

But yes, so the spending, you recognized how. When did it hit you that the spending was not sustainable?

Speaker 1:

Well, you know that that kind of time, that that behavior went on for the entire year that I was living at my parents house, right, and like I was kind of saying like shopping really became like my coping mechanism, like it just became my escape, right, like I hated my job. So what I would do is I would leave the dealership and I would go up to the mall and I would just shop on my lunch break, right, like it wasn't uncommon for me to just drop like three, four or $500 on my lunch break, and that was happening multiple times a week. And so the end of that year came and my parents are like okay, here's the deal. You've been here a year, like time for you to go. And I couldn't even afford a security deposit to move out of my parents' house. And my parents are looking at me being like what do you mean? You can't move out.

Speaker 1:

Like we know that you've been making, like we know what you make and we know that you really haven't had any expenses, because work covers a lot of your expenses and basically you living here has covered the rest of them. So like where's all your money? And you know my entire salary was basically just in my closet and that was really my wake-up moment, to where I was like okay, whoa, this is a problem. Like I knew that I was shopping a lot. I knew that I was spending a lot, but when it really does get to that point of almost becoming like a compulsion, it's almost kind of like you disassociate a bit, like when you're shopping and when you're spending and when you're constantly bringing things in. It's kind of like it's almost like you're watching yourself from like 30,000 feet. So that was my wake-up moment to be like I've got to do something about this or I'm gonna be broke for the rest of my life.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, no, I can totally relate to that comfort. I would say outside of, maybe, food. Yeah, yeah, even to this day, like if I'm just having a really like bad day, bad week, I will totally hit up Target, tj Maxx. I have gotten I'm pretty disciplined about not spending over spending but like for me it's almost therapeutic just to walk around and sniff candles and touch blankets, like it definitely comforts me. But I, because of the business that I'm in and the knowledge that I have, have been able to stop myself. So I do. I can totally relate and I still would say I don't wanna say it's a problem anymore, but it is a thing of comfort for me too.

Speaker 1:

Yeah and listen. That's so common for all of us and I think, like it's just recognizing that one, like if anything that we talk about today like resonates with you, like first and foremost, like please don't use this episode to beat yourself up or to like spiral in shame, because the reality of it is is, this is a huge problem for so many people. When I first started talking about money, probably six or seven years ago, I was literally just talking about anything and everything related to money. Like if it touched money, I would talk about it. But I would say, probably in the last like three or four years, this was the one issue that kept coming up over and over and over and over. But it was also happening in secret. Like people would come to me in secret, like in my DMs, or they would email me, like it was never out in the open, and it would be like hey, like I think I might have a shopping addiction. Hey, I'm in $10,000 worth of credit card debt. Hey, I have this debt on a credit card that my spouse or partner doesn't know about, and I would say that I kind of call it the perfect store and that's been brewing probably the last five years.

Speaker 1:

It's three things. It's one, the rise in technology. So just think about how Amazon and just technology in general has changed the way that we shop and how it's primed us for that instant gratification of like seeing something, wanting something, buying it and then literally having it, sometimes within hours. Right, like that's completely changed the game. Social media is the second one. So it's like the level of transparency that we now have into like thousands of people's lives that we really don't even know, that we never had before. That's taking the level of comparison that we do to a whole new level. And then the pandemic is the third part of that right, where people were stuck in their homes. They were worried, they were bored, they were scared. Lots of negative emotion happening. Lots of people were getting money from the government.

Speaker 1:

And it's like I can't go anywhere or do anything. So what am I gonna do? I'm gonna shop, have it delivered. Yeah, I'm gonna have it delivered. So I think, between I think this issue, like all that to say is that, like this has always been an issue for people, always.

Speaker 1:

But I do feel that within the last couple of years, this perfect storm has been brewing and it's just really bringing this issue to a head, and that's why I decided I think it was like three years ago like this is what I'm really going to niche down to, like this one specific thing, cause it's kind of what you said at the beginning like when I went to go out and find solutions to this problem, like when I realized, oh, this is a problem that I need to find solutions to, and I actually went looking for solutions.

Speaker 1:

I really couldn't find solutions that felt like they were going to help me, because they were all coming from people that I felt like didn't understand me, aka older men and they were all what I call band-aid solutions. So they were all basically like wrap yourself in bubble wrap, like unfollow everyone you follow on social media, unscribe from all your emails, delete your credit card, auto-fill, never go to Target again and I'm just like, well, that's not, that's not happening, that's just not, that's not happening. Like that's, it's just not realistic. And so that's why I was like there's got to be other solutions to actually solve, like the internal root of like why I'm doing what I'm doing, and so that's what I set out to do, and that's why I created overcoming over spending Cause. To your point, I'm like A no one's talking about this. And B this is becoming such a huge issue for people.

Speaker 2:

So, all that to say, if you're like, yes, this is something that I really struggle with, and you feel like you're the only one, you're not, like you're actually the majority, like we all struggle with this, so and I love that you come from a place of that, because, yeah, the same thing, like there aren't a lot of resources for people, and then that idea I think so often my clients that come to me are, like you know, to be told by middle age, older, male, like hey, you've got to stop spending or you've got to spend within this.

Speaker 2:

I mean, that just makes people angry and it's not offering them help for the problem. It's just telling them, like stop spending, okay. Like do this. Like what's wrong with you? Why can't you just do this, as opposed to saying, hey, I was there and I fixed it for myself. And let me share with you some of the ways. I mean, that is just that's what attracted me to your page some of your TikToks and your Instagram reels. I mean, obviously, it's social media, so you're giving little tidbits to draw people in, but you also have coaching that offers people some real solutions to this problem. So let's talk a little bit about you know this resonates with someone and they're saying, yes, I have this problem and I love that. You pointed out some of the reasons behind it with, like the links to everybody, everything that you see, and I even am blown away. I feel like I have a lot of stuff, but when I see like the organizers that people have and the restock videos and reels where people are like, I'm like who has that much stuff?

Speaker 2:

And like buying all these expensive makeups and like you know where they do the little like click, click, click click on every little bottle.

Speaker 1:

I'm like that's what's-.

Speaker 2:

The ASMR restocking videos yes or like let me put my face on and I'm like I'm sitting there going that's like $1,200 worth of stuff, and I see in her bio that she's an influencer. Like literally, how is she affording all of this stuff? And it does get to you that like, well, maybe I should have that fancy face stuff and I would look cute if I had this and that's the solution to my problems.

Speaker 2:

And people are trying to sell you that through social media, and now you can just click below and buy your solution to your problem. So, that's a real issue. Now you mentioned that, the solution being, like you know, get out of there and not see those things or not walk into Target, and that's not really realistic in this day and age. So what is like the first step?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I really have all of my. So I kind of have a three phase process right. So it's kind of like do this first and then do the second and do this third, the last. I always start by explaining that the last phase in my process is the actual like management of your money, of like okay, here's like let's like break down the black and white numbers, let's look at what you have coming in and what you have going out. That's actually the last thing that I have people do, which for most people, that's the first place that most people have. You start and you're exactly right.

Speaker 1:

For a lot of people, if that's where they start and they don't address the first two parts of this, it usually, from what I see, will break down, which then leaves the person feeling super frustrated and feeling like well, what's wrong with me that I can't like that I have this plan and it's like super clear to me like what I should be doing, but I can't like seem to just get myself to do it. So the first two parts of the phase are all about your mindset and all about emotions, and so I want you to think about it like this I always explain money is kind of like an iceberg. So with an iceberg you have like 10 to 20% of the iceberg that you can actually see that's poking out above the water. That's the math, that's like the black and white. That's like, okay, here's what you have coming in and here's what you have coming out, and here's what you need to put towards your debt and here's what you need to save. It's like the strategy and the tactics.

Speaker 1:

But then there's like this whole mass underneath the surface of the water that you can't see. But that's where the bulk of it lies. That's the mindset and that's the emotions. And I kind of explain, like it's the why versus the how. Why am I doing the things that I'm doing? And that why portion that behavioral portion? That's the part that needs to be addressed before you kind of tackle the how. So I can dive into mindset and then talk about the emotions piece a little bit. But with mindset I will say them. I teach several things here, but I'll just kind of talk about like one super important component with your mindset.

Speaker 2:

And just as a time out to age. Don't feel like you have to give away it, like I want people to sign up and I'm going to plug your coaching in the end. So don't give away all the you know what I mean?

Speaker 1:

Oh no, it's yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

I want people to sign up, so feel free to like I don't need all the answers. Give them Jesus, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I'll give you so like there's. There's several components to each of like the mindset and the emotions, and I'll just kind of give you like, for the sake of our time here, I'll just kind of give you like one of each. But one of the most important things with your mindset is something that I call your spending self concept, and you and I were talking about this before we hit the record button. But I feel like spending is so different than most silos of money, because I feel like, when we start looking at all these different aspects of money, like let's take a big part of what you do right, like investing.

Speaker 1:

Most of us understand that investing isn't something that we just like shouldn't know how to do, right, like. We understand like, oh, I'm either going to have to have someone help me with this or I'm going to have to take steps to learn how to invest their skill, their strategy. There's knowledge, there's intention behind building an investing platform or strategy. We don't think about spending that way. Like we think about spending, kind of how we think about breathing in terms of, like you just come into the world knowing how to breathe. No one has to teach you how to breathe, you just come into the world and you just start breathing and you just know how to do it and you just do it for the rest of your life. That's how we think about spending. We think you make money and you spend it. We don't view money.

Speaker 2:

I'm naturally good at spending money.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, exactly Exactly. And so, because of that, we view spending not as a skill. We view it as like a trait or like part of your identity or part of your personality, and that is what your spending self concept is, and so many of the women that come into my community that's one of the first places that I have them start and evaluate is what is your spending self concept? Because the way that our brains are wired to work this is like kind of the cool psychology behind it is, whatever you identify as you will never surpass that your brain is always going to your brain and your nervous system is always going to be working to keep you within the confines of your identity and of your self concept, because that's what it knows and it's familiar to it and it's safe and certain.

Speaker 2:

No, when you say self concept, do you mean like I'm a spender or I am a same?

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So like here's a couple of examples of like what a spending self concept could be. One is like I'm a shopper, I'm a spender. I hear this all the time with women like oh, I'm the spender and my husband's the saver, right, and we say it very like jokie, like oh, haha, and I totally understand. Like it's obviously meant in like a very lighthearted way, but it's like having a self concept of I'm a spender, I'm a splurger, I'm a spender, over spender.

Speaker 1:

I can't be trusted with money, I'm bad with money, I always blow it. Those are all examples of self concepts and they're not facts of the world. Like that's the first place you have to start is understanding like this self concept is not a fact of the world. It's simply just how I've taken evidence from my past and what my brain is making it mean. But evaluating what is my spending self concept and is my spending self concept actually helping me become a better spender? Is it helping me be better with money or is it keeping me? I kind of call it like identity imprisonment. It's like, is my identity holding me captive? Like am I being imprisoned by my identity that my brain is kind of keeping me attached to? So that's the first place you have to start, because if you like, this is what I always tell the women in my community.

Speaker 1:

I'm like, if you believe you're bad with money, you will be bad with money. If you believe that you can't be trusted with money, you will make untrustworthy choices with your money, like whatever you, which then just creates this vicious cycle. Because it's like you're out here thinking that this is just a fact of the world, when really it's just a belief. But whatever you believe, you will create. And so then you go and you create it, which then gives you more evidence, which then just strengthens the self concept, which then just so it becomes kind of like this vicious cycle that the more you believe, the more evidence you'll get, which then the deeper it becomes.

Speaker 1:

And it's just like the more times you go through that cycle, the harder it is to kind of break yourself out of. But it's always possible to break yourself out of. So that's why I'm saying like the mindset, the psychology behind this is so huge, because it doesn't matter how pretty your budget is, it doesn't matter how pretty and organized and how many emojis there are and like whatever, like none of that matters If you have a spending self concept, that you can't do this, that you're bad with money, that you can't be trusted and you're always going to blow it, like no budget is going to be able to come in and save you until you address what your self concept is. So that's one good place to start and I'll stop there.

Speaker 2:

I love that.

Speaker 2:

I think that's true in investing too. I mentioned offline. I work with a lot of women post divorce, so maybe they didn't do the household budgeting or the investing portion is very common. So I'm teaching them and I say teaching them. Obviously they're hiring me as a professional, but I want them to have agency over their finances.

Speaker 2:

That's really important to us at Pearl Planning, which is I will do a lot of the work for you, but you're going to know what you have and why and why we're doing what we're doing, and to see that transformation from like a first meeting and women all have to say I'm bad with money, I don't know what I'm doing, I'm not good at investing. My husband always took care of it and when I look at the statement, sometimes they didn't do a great job taking care of it. Right, this was a concept. And then, after a little bit of training on what we're doing and why, to have that meeting and have the woman come in and be like okay, what are my accounts at? What did it do last year? How much do you think we should increase? You know X amount to my IRA. I love that.

Speaker 2:

That's what I live for is to see, even though I am working with them and providing a service, like I want them to know what they have and why they're doing what they're doing, I do think sometimes overspending could be a case of not knowing where else it could go and what it can provide you in the future. Almost a concept like that's not my money, the future money isn't for me. That's like you know. It's more like less than I'm going to have to spend today. That's a huge concept in investing and I love that idea. I'm going to steal it and use it. Please do that mindset, because if you go into it saying I'm terrible at investing or I don't know what I'm doing, how are you ever going to break out of it?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and one thing one like small subtle shift that I always have people make is is I'm like, listen, sometimes it's easier to work with your brain than to completely fight against your brain. And depending on, like I was saying, depending on how deep that self concept has become, instead of like right out of the gate working to form a completely new self concept, one just like subtle shift that you can make right out of the gate is to either frame it in a way of like this is something that I used to do or this is something that I'm working to get better at. So, instead of saying I'm bad with money, saying I used to be bad with money Right, because it's like, instead of instead of having to shift completely from like I'm bad with money to I'm great with money, which for many of our brains in the beginning is too big of a shift to make, it's like I used to be bad with money, or I'm working to get better with money, right, I like that, I'm, I'm, I'm working on it, like I'm getting myself there, but just kind of like gradually working your way. But, yeah, like you're, I always say your brain is a computer and whatever you feed it, it's that's the programming that you're putting into into the computer and I think, also realizing that like as women I know you guys mostly work with women at your practice but like as women, we're also working up against decades of societal programming that we've all been told our entire lives that, like you're bad with money, the men should manage the money.

Speaker 1:

You really shouldn't have a seat at the table here, and so it's just recognizing all of that societal programming. I mean I think it was up until like 30 years ago as a woman like you still had to have, like if you wanted to get like a credit card or like a bank account or something you still had to have like a mail cosigner, like maybe not 30. It wasn't, it wasn't 30 years ago, it was like in the 70s, like 60, 50, 60 years ago. But even in terms of time that's like a blink, like that's not that long ago that we were kept from having access to these resources and having a seat at the table and being able to be a part of these conversations. And there's still very much of that like societal programming wrapped up that we hear all the time. I mean even now, like we were talking about TikTok. You get on TikTok. Every other video you see is about like girl math and like the foundation of girl math is basically saying like you can't do math.

Speaker 1:

Girls can't do math, we can't do money, we can't make smart choices with our money. We spend money in stupid ways, like we make all these, like jumps and leaps, like when we're justifying our purchases. It's like every human brain does this, like male brains do this and female brains do this. It's just like, again, it's just going back to this, like lens of it's only women and girls who are bad with money and really just like noticing that that's out there and it's something that you've absorbed. Like you don't have to buy into that, you don't have to believe it and you can question it and just choose to opt out of it and be like I'm not buying into this.

Speaker 2:

So it's not helping you, it's not no, and we did an episode on girl math kind of. You know, my thought on it is I don't love it, but at least it's getting people talking about money, because, as you mentioned, talking about spending, talking about investing, it's like shh, we're not going to talk about this. So I like that it's getting people to talk about it. And how ridiculous it is because I think most women realize that, like, even though we joke about oh well, I returned it, and then it's like it never happened, or it's like I gained $50 because I returned this item, it is a level of humor and we do a great job.

Speaker 2:

Especially we'll talk about this time of year with holiday spending Like, most of the time, women are the one in the household that are doing all the purchasing, all the budgeting. Yeah, thank you. It's not easy. I don't think I know if I were to say to my husband hey, you're handling Christmas for both kids like he would spend way more than me because he wouldn't know what to do and he would just go out and be like ma, put it in the car.

Speaker 1:

So well, you know, what's funny is like there's been a lot of studies that have showed that have studied like spending habits and Differences between men and women and like pretty much all the studies show that like men spend more than women do.

Speaker 2:

Oh, yeah, for sure. And it's not. I mean, I'm buying, I'm still the one. Both my husband and I are in the financial business, so like we do it together, the the main finances for the household and the big spending. But when it comes to spending, I of course I'm going to target to buy like toilet paper and laundry soap every once in a while. Like a throw pillow will jump into my cart, for sure, but his big spending, like he'll go on a golf waiting weekend or a golf outing and drop, yeah, at least four target trips.

Speaker 2:

Right right, like that. I know, coming home with laundry detergent or toilet paper is coming home with like Like a hangover, right. Yeah, like I just feel like let me say that I am living this like totally you know the Stereotype, I guess, if you will, with men and women, and I see it every day and I know to your point of like what I used to feel when I was a stay-at-home mom for a period of time that I'm a spender, I'm the one that spends all the money and he makes yeah, yeah it took some time to get out of that mindset.

Speaker 2:

But I spend, but I know my limits, I know yes. I can spend on the extra items that jump into my cart and what I can't. I think that that has really been a journey for me, but I I didn't have any help. I learned through failure. That's, that's the only way to learn. Yeah and really and everything else. But yeah, now, there you have this service and and some insight for people. So, mindset, I got you off track, so I apologize that.

Speaker 1:

The no yeah, so I mean yeah, so so phase one was the mindset and you know Really about evaluating your spending. Self concept is the most important part there. And then the second part is the emotional component of it, right, and I think it's just realizing that anything that we want or Desire as human beings is really because of how we think we're going to feel once we have it. And we kind of touched on social media. I mean, that's a big part of social media, right. It's like, really like when you see someone Doing their skincare routine, or when you see someone's closet, or when you see someone, like stocking their fridge or stocking their pantry, on the surface of it, it seems like, oh, I would love to have a wardrobe like hers, oh, I would love to have a pantry that looks like that. But really what you're after is an emotion, and that's what advertising is. I mean advertising a lot of us think like advertising is about a product. Advertising is really like, if you look past the product, all advertising is really about trying to sell you an Emotion, an emotional experience, and that's really all we're after as human beings is just to feel good, like we just want to feel good, and we have all been conditioned to believe that products can fill emotional voids and that Products do have the ability to deliver an emotional experience to us, right and so really kind of unpacking, like the emotional component of emotions. And then also, too, there's another big asset or aspect of the emotional side, which is just Trying to make your feel, trying to make yourself feel better with shopping, and that's what I was trying to do right when I was in the heyday of my shopping, like shopping was how I would Distract myself from all of the negative emotions in my life that I didn't want to be feeling, and One of the primary they.

Speaker 1:

There was actually this study that was done that showed that one of the biggest indicators of Compulsive shoppers is the mood that they're in when they start shopping, and this is something to really pay attention to. Like what? Like? Typically, when I go shopping, what mood am I in? Am I in a negative mood and am I using to try to change my emotional state? Am I trying to make myself feel better? Because if you are, if you are using shopping to change your emotional state, that's basically like using it as your coping mechanism, just how we talked about, like using food to do that or using alcohol to do that you can absolutely use shopping as your coping mechanism and so figuring out more constructive ways, other than shopping, to deal with your negative emotions. Because what that study found was Compulsive shoppers Typically start shopping when they're in a negative mood and then they shop and they buy something and their mood like shoots up. Of course, because they get they get this really like fast release of dopamine when they do buy something. But then and many of you listening might have experienced this After that initial rush, there's always a crash and there's always like this big crash and this big letdown and that's like the guilt you feel, the buyers remorse you feel kind of maybe like that panic that you feel after you spend a lot of money and bought a lot of things, and when you crash, you always typically come down and you end up further.

Speaker 1:

Then you even started with, and so that's like the tricky thing about shopping is like we think shopping is like a long-term solution to making us feel better, but when you are using shopping as an emotional crutch, it actually just makes the emotional problems worse, like, and it's tricky because it's, it's deceiving, because, like you do have that moment, like when you are shopping, that you're like, oh, my god, this feels so good, like this feels just like euphoric and like I feel amazing, but then it's all.

Speaker 1:

There's always that crash that brings you down, back lower, and so it's dealing with that emotional aspect of it, right, like dealing with Not shopping when you're in a negative state, not using shopping as your emotional crutch. And also, to a big part of this is just the fact that, like, once you've gotten into this habit, just like any habit you will start to develop an urge to do it. I call this your urge to splurge, and an urge is simply just a feeling, right? It's just a vibration in your body and it's training yourself to allow that urge To go over spend or to go buffer with shopping and not answering that urge. Like sitting with that urge and not answering it. Answering it with shopping, which is so much easier said than done. It's hard, it's uncomfortable, but it's work that you have to do. Again, it just goes with the mindset. It's like if we don't do the work here, no budget is gonna be able to save you.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I'm gonna share with you something that I did overcome my like shopping. I don't know if it's yeah, tell me tell me if it's like a bad thing.

Speaker 2:

A bad one way that I have done is I do fake shopping. So, yeah, I love to put stuff in my cart knowing I'm not actually gonna buy it, at least not today, yeah, and sort of delaying the gratification. So, for instance, I love to do like DIY projects around my house and I always love to you know Ikea and Canton, like that's one of my places where I save money because I buy things that look high-end but they're not or all, yeah, construct them, paint them, add new knobs to them. So overall I feel like not to be girl-mouth, but sometimes I feel like I'm saving money because if I know what you're sure.

Speaker 2:

Whatever, but I will put these items in my cart in Amazon, save for later or like at different stores, and then walk away. But I enjoy the like selection of these things, yeah. And then I think to myself, if I still want this a month later, six months later, then it's there and I can go back to it. And sometimes I get confused. I'm like I don't know if I actually ordered the cartons or if they're still in some cart somewhere, but it does fulfill a need that, like I enjoyed doing that, and then I spend. I don't actually spend a lot of money, I don't actually buy all the things, but it still feels like an emotional, like am I wrong to do that?

Speaker 1:

No, no, no, no. That's actually so I one tool that I usually tell everyone to start with and I think this is kind of like perfect, that the conversation is leading here but so this is something that a tool that I call a things I want to buy list, and so you could absolutely do it the way that you're doing it. I know a lot of people they'll just go, they'll just add stuff to their carts and exactly what you said.

Speaker 1:

It's just like just the act of doing it and finding things and adding the things to your cart, like that's enough to kind of like scratch the itch to where you're like, okay, I'm good, like I don't need to like actually, like, take the next step and click, like the buy now button. What I do is I have something called a things I want to buy list and I keep mine and something called notion. Notion is just like a website that you can use to like kind of organize your life, like it's kind of like a fancier version of like the notes app on your phone, but it's called notion. Yeah, in OT, I own notion and it's free. You can just go and just create, create an account. So I keep my things I want to buy, list and notion. But here's what I do. So, like anytime.

Speaker 1:

Let's say I'm on social media and I get an ad for something and I'm like, ooh, like that's pretty, I like that. I'll take a screenshot of it. Or if I see an influencer, who's you know, wearing something that I'm like, oh, that's super cute, I'll take a screenshot of it. If I'm at Target in person and I see something, I'll take a picture of it. So I have an album on my phone that's called things I want to buy and anything that I take a screenshot of or picture of goes into that album and then I would say probably like once a week I'll sit down at my computer.

Speaker 1:

I kind of have like one day of the week where I kind of like wrap my week up, like I tie it. I tie up a bunch of loose ends before, like, my weekend starts, and one part of that process is I go through that album on my phone and I add everything to that, things I want to buy, list and notion, and you know all the details for it. I'll say what it is, where it's from, how much it costs, if it's. If I found it online, I'll put a link to it online. But you're absolutely right, like here's the thing about shopping and buying is that I hear this from my clients all the time is that for most of us, the period of time that actually feels the best, that we get the most like pleasure from, is actually the period of time leading up to a purchase. It's not actually, yeah, it's like the anticipation, the hunt, just kind of getting to like relish in what's to come. And there's actually been studies that have shown. Well, I mean, first of all, like scientists call dopamine the anticipation molecule we do get dopamine when we buy something, but we get much more dopamine in anticipation of getting to buy something. They did this study that I found fascinating, that found that most people actually get more pleasure out of the period of time before you take a vacation than on the vacation itself. Absolutely. And I know like, yeah, and I know like for me, like talking about we have the holidays coming up, like I've always said this, like I have always felt like I enjoy Christmas Eve day so much more than like actual, like Christmas day, and I think those are just a couple of examples to show that like where we really get the pleasure is anticipation. So it's like how can we take that and apply it to the way that we spend money? And, to your point, it's putting tools in place so we can extend that anticipation as long as possible.

Speaker 1:

And doing what you do, adding things into your cart but then not hitting that button, starting a things I want to buy list. What it does is it allows you to kind of hit, to get that hit of dopamine that your brain really wants, but you're not spending any money. And I would say for me, like half the stuff that I put on my things I want to buy list, I actually never end up buying because once I kind of like revisit it. I'm like I'm good. I my brain got a little hyper about this thing. Now that I've given myself some more time to think about it, I don't think I want it, because when you do see something that you want to buy like, let's say, you're strolling the aisles of Target or you're on social media scrolling when you see something that you want to buy, psychologically it's like the same thing is happening in your brain.

Speaker 1:

That happens like when you eat sugar or drink alcohol your pleasure systems activate, your brain gets flooded with dopamine and your brain, like you go from being in a very logical state of mind to going to what I call the downstairs part of your brain, like the caveman, lizard part of your brain that just wants to do what feels good in that moment and that's not the place that we want to be making purchasing decision from Right. So when you can like add things to that list, it allows your brain to like I call it just giving yourself like a cool off period. It allows your brain to go back into that logical state of mind, which is why I always say, like time is going to bring a clear head and that's why when you can give yourself time. Like half the time you're like, oh no, no, no, like I don't really even want this thing anymore, because you're back into that logical state of your mind where you're you're like, yeah, my brain got a little hyper about this, but like I'm good, I'm fine, I don't need it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, that absolutely happens. Every once in a while I will be like, oh, I should have gotten that thing Right, like I didn't buy it, whether it's at like Target, where it's just not there anymore, or like TJ Maxx, where, like you'll never find it again, and I've gone back for something and isn't there but more time, nine times out of 10, it's the other way around, where you either have regret for buying something and like that was stupid, or that I didn't buy it. I'm like, oh, thank God I didn't buy that, because I'm not even going to redo that dress or whatever it was that I was looking to purchase. So I love that and I'm in. It's interesting that I actually was onto something I didn't know, because I thought it was no, absolutely shopping.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, exactly, just anything that you can do like here's, here's what, like one of my big things in the beginning is like, if this is something that you're struggling with, one of the best steps that you can take for yourself in these beginning stages is to think about how can I give my brain what it really wants without having to actually buy things and overspend and spend the money because, again, what your brain really wants is a hit of dopamine. So it's like how can I give my brain that hit of dopamine without actually buying things and, to your point, doing like fake shopping or doing the things I want to buy list I have like I'll give you just one more tool. I teach the women in my community something called urge jars and I always keep my urge jars at my desk because I live at my. I really don't move much from my desk. I sit here most of the day. I do most of my shopping on my computer. That's right in front of my face.

Speaker 1:

But this is my urge jar. But it's just like two little containers and anytime I like feel the urge to the urge to splurge, I'll sit with the urge, I'll process the urge and then I'll take a trinket from one and I'll move it to the other, and you do this 100 times. So the goal is to get all the trinkets in this one over to this one. There's no, there's no time frame, like it takes you as long as it's going to take you. But there's just something about like our human brains like to see progress, they like to see accumulation and it what it also does it's it's a visual representation of all of the money that you would have spent but you didn't spend. And another thing that I have my clients do is actually log. Like I'm like OK, every time you do this, every time you move one trinket from one to the other, keep a log and write it down.

Speaker 1:

Like I would have bought this top from Zara and I would have spent $50 on that top, but I didn't, and so actually yeah, like totaling it up, because that's when you can start to almost like gamify, not spending money, Like it's like, how can I make not spending money feel as enjoyable to me as spending money feels to me right now? And this is a really good tool to do that, Because I think at the beginning a lot of people are like oh, instead of shopping, like go on a walk or knit or like whatever.

Speaker 1:

And it's like the same don't mean hit, yeah, yeah, yeah, and it's like, and it's like, yeah, like, ok, like I hear you, I get it, but in the beginning it's like you could go on a walk, you could knit, but but you know, it's like I have to find ways to still give my brain the thing that it's wanting without spending the money. And so those are some really good like first steps that you can take.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I love that. I love the jar idea and kind of giving yourself that kind of delayed gratification but then actually seeing the dollar amount that you're not spending. I love the idea of logging that especially just because you know I deal in finance, so that's appealing to me and it's crazy.

Speaker 1:

You will shock yourself Like you don't even realize, like how much money you're just like you're you're spending, until you actually start to track it. Like I had one client who she got through all 100 of hers. She had enough money. She took her whole family to Disney.

Speaker 2:

Oh, wow so it was crazy. You're not going to necessarily spend the money that you saved. Maybe you're investing in it. Yeah, what I mean.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what I always tell people to do is, like every probably like 10 to 10 to like 20 urges to total it up, and then I always say, look at what that amount is and let's make a choice To do something with that money that feels more aligned to you than probably what you would have done if you had just gone and made a bunch of impulse purchases with it and bought a bunch of stuff. So, like you know to your point, some women will take it and they'll put it towards credit card debt. Some women will take it and put it in a savings account and sometimes I'm like, listen, like using it to make an aligned purchase, like taking your family on a dream vacation and being able to say, like I did this because I was more intentional with my spending, like that's huge and I think, like that's. Another good point to make is that my whole message is not to say that you should not be spending money, like that's not.

Speaker 1:

That's not the goal. The goal is not to get to your point, to a point where you're like a hoarder, where you never spend any money on anything and your frugal and your cheap and your tightwad Like that's not what the ultimate goal is. The goal is to be spending your money in a way that makes your life more meaningful, better and spending that doesn't hurt you in the long run. Like spending that you're not doing against yourself, like that's the goal. But of course, that means you can still spend money, like the goal isn't just to stop spending money altogether.

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, and I think too, the board budget, which I know you said was kind of the final component that's always the first one that we start with in financial planning, because if I'm trying to figure out how much people can save and how much they're going to spend in retirement, I need to know what they're spending now, because the idea is to make that seamless Right.

Speaker 2:

The income stops, but you continue to spend the same way. It always surprises me one how many people don't know what's going out on a regular basis. So, sitting down with those numbers, but also and I kind of lost my train of thought because of the leaf blower that's coming, oh, it's okay, I can't hear anything.

Speaker 2:

You can't hear it, okay, good, no, because I feel like I can at least separate out your vocals from mine when you're talking and get rid of the sound, but no, I can't hear anything. Yeah, so I mean we start with that first, but oftentimes people don't know that number, which again is shocking and concerning. But once they've done this mindset and they've figured out their like and I apologize because I've already lost the term for it like the internal yeah, like the internal motivators for why they're shopping.

Speaker 2:

And then like what they perceive themselves as as a spender, then they have to actually go look at the numbers, right? So what do you recommend when they get to that third step?

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So once we've kind of started to look at the mindset and the emotional component, then it's like, ok, well, let's actually start to sit down and kind of look at, to your point, what do we have coming in and what do we have going out? Is there any debt involved? Which I will say, probably 90% of the women in my community are in some form of debt. It's mostly credit card debt, credit card debt, personal loan debt, but it's probably very similar to what you have your clients do. But I kind of teach, I call it a money map. Right, that's what I call a budget. And I call it a money map because I feel like when you use the word budget, people like curl back up into their shell and they're like ooh, budget, like I just that word, like some people just have like such a visceral reaction to that word. So I call it a money map because I'm like listen, all we're doing it's just like a map. All we're doing is we're determining where you are now and where you want to get to, and this is going to be a map that's going to give you directions from point A to point B.

Speaker 1:

I always have people break out their expenses into five different categories and I call these priorities the reason that I do this and I don't know if you see this, I'm sure you do but I feel like, logically, a lot of us understand that there are expenses that are more important than other expenses. Like, for an example, most of us understand that it's more important that we pay our water bill so that we have water in our house, than it is to pay our Netflix bill, right, like there's certain things where we're like this trumps this, this is more important than this. Logically, we know that. But, to your point, when we're just out willy nilly, kind of like unconsciously spending, what I often see happen a lot with my clients is a lot of the stuff that should be lower priority takes first priority, right, and then when it comes to making sure that you have enough money to pay your rent or mortgage or to pay your utilities or your cell phone bill or buy medication that you need or the more important things were like, well, shoot, I don't have any more money, like I spent all the money, so then those things have to go onto credit cards.

Speaker 1:

So I always have people start by listing out all of their expenses, like OK, in a given month. I want you to list out everything that you think that you're going to be spending money on, whether it's a bill that you know that you're going to be paying or it's more of like a variable expense, like groceries, eating out, entertainment stuff for your kids, whatever. And then what I do is I always have people place that into the priorities. So priority one is your needs and necessities. So of course, this is the most important your rent or mortgage, your utilities, medications, things like that. That's like OK, that's first up. The second priority are your debt payments, because to me, I'm like the next most important thing is for us to ensure that you can meet your minimum debt obligations, that you're not falling behind on those. Obviously, that's important. Then the third priority is what's a current financial goal that you want to work towards whether you want to save up an emergency fund, you want to get out of debt, you want to save up a home-down payment, and I have my clients pick an amount that they want to put towards that financial goal every single month, and then I have sinking funds is the fourth priority, which is just smaller pools of savings that you're saving up for things that you know are coming like, let's just say, annual subscriptions, your car registration, your pets' vaccinations that you know that you have to pay for every year, things like that. And then the fifth priority are what I call your wants or your money loves. These are things that you love to spend money on and they're more of the wants, the nice to have, versus the need to have. And that's how I structure my budget. Like if you were to look at my budget, it's structured in that way.

Speaker 1:

I actually use a budgeting software called YNAB, which stands for you Need a Budget. I love it. I'm a big fan of YNAB. I've used YNAB for years. But I also understand like I've literally referred like thousands of people to YNAB and the feedback that I get is like twofold on YNAB. I either hear that people love it and they're obsessed with it, or they're like I absolutely hate this, like there's no in between with YNAB. But my thing is is like I don't pigeonhole people into saying, like you have to use YNAB. I teach a system, I teach the priorities and then I say like if you want to do this on pen and paper, do it on pen and paper. If you want to do it in a Google Sheet or an Excel document, do that. If you want to use a software, maybe you want to use YNAB or every dollar, or I know Mint's going away. I think like Rocket Money is Quicken's version of it, but just finding a system that works for you.

Speaker 1:

But when you have all these priorities yeah, exactly that's going to work for you, that you're going to use, that is going to be sustainable and approachable for you over a long period of time. But then it's taking all of this data that you've collected and putting it into your system. And I will say this with just like budgeting, I think this is really important to kind of point out is that if you're in a position where you've never created a budget or a spending plan or a money map, whatever you want to call it before, it's really important to recognize that there is going to be an initial investment of your time and energy in the beginning, because you're going to have to spend time like getting your numbers and looking up your bills and figuring out like, well, when is that bill due and what's the amount? Like there is a certain amount of energy that you have to put in in the beginning, and a big mistake that I feel people fall into is they think that the amount of energy that's required of them in the beginning of this process will be required of them throughout the whole process, and I always like to say like the beginning is the hardest part. That's the part that's going to require the most of your time, effort and energy. But what you're doing is you're building a system, you're building a machine, really, that can just start running for you over time. So there's going to be a really big investment of your time and energy in the beginning, but the goal is, once you set that up, it will then require maybe a minute of your day every day from that point forward. So it's like you've got to get yourself through that initial first phase of it and keep reminding yourself. It's not going to be like this forever. It's not going to be like this forever. Like I'm building a machine, I'm building a system and the whole point of a system is like to put the effort and energy in in the beginning to save you 10-fold that down the road.

Speaker 1:

Like I probably spend, I would say. I check in with YNAB almost daily. I've just I've worked it into my daily routine and I'm not saying that you have to do it daily. It's just what I do and what I prefer. But I am checking in with my YNAB budget. I'd say close to every day, definitely Monday through Friday. It's just part of my routine.

Speaker 1:

I sit down at my desk, I pull up YNAB, I'm in there for maybe like one to two minutes. I'm logging transactions from the day before because it all hooks up to, like, my bank accounts and my credit cards, and then I'm out and on with my day. So when you total that up over a month, it's maybe an hour of my time every month. And when you're thinking about, like, is my money worth that? Is my money worth an hour of my time every single month to make sure that, like, I'm managing it and I'm staying on top of things? Like, the answer is absolutely yes, and I think a lot of people think what I. Like I don't have time to check in with my money every day. I don't have time to do this Like. It's so time consuming, it's so cumbersome. It's like If you're listening to this podcast, if you're listening to this, podcast If they're overstanding.

Speaker 2:

They're spending a lot of time shopping for things. Yes, yes, I know I'm like how much time are you spending shopping?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's like how much time are you spending on social media? How much time are you spending shopping? How much time are you just spending like kind of doing these, like mindless activities, and so I think that's a trap that a lot of people fall into is like, oh, this is going to, this is going to take so much time. It's going to take more time in the beginning, but overall, in the span of your lifetime, it does not take much time at all, like if you're listening to this podcast. If you spend even 10 minutes a day on social media, which I know many of us do, you have plenty of time to manage your money and manage it really really well.

Speaker 2:

So I love that. Yes, and I'm absolutely spending at least 10 minutes a day.

Speaker 1:

Oh, it's like look at your screen time report on your phone. No, 100%, or not, or not.

Speaker 2:

I'm sure it combines my kids. Before we wrap up, I want to talk about how people get in touch with you and what services you offer, because, again, this is such a needed thing. I know you've shared some advice on here, but if you're like me and you're wanting more of what Page has to offer, tell me about the group shopping or listen to me now you've got me in the shopping thing About the group program for people that need more help.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I run my business is called Overcoming Overspending and what that is is it's a group coaching membership. So it's a membership that you would join and you pay every single month to be in the group and you can come and you can stay for as long as you want or as short as you want. We have people that have been in there it's almost approaching being a year old, so we have people in the group that have been there that whole time and we have people that come in for a month and then they feel like it's complete and then they'll leave. But when you join the membership, you get my entire process, the kind of three phases that we talked about today. So managing your mind, managing your emotions, managing your money. You also get access to a ton of bonus courses that I have. Like I have a YNAB tutorial in there where I'll teach you how to use YNAB, the budgeting software.

Speaker 1:

I was talking about tons of bonus resources in there and I would say probably the most valuable component of the membership is the live coaching component I'm really, really big on. I want, I'm like, if you're in there, I want you to feel like you have support, like you have a place that you can go to get coaching and ask questions from me. So we meet like 10 to 12 times every single month. We do like two to three calls every week. We're always on Zoom. They're always live. We always do them at different times of the day. I change the schedule every single month to just accommodate different schedules and also different time zones. We have people from all over the world. We have a lot of US and Canada people, but we also have people in Thailand and the Philippines and the UK and South Africa. So we always change the coaching schedule to accommodate schedules and different time zones.

Speaker 2:

And I will put the link in the show notes. For overcoming overspending the membership, I'm also going to link your podcast. So if you want to hear a little more of Paige before making a decision on that, check out the Money Love podcast. And then, of course, how I found her. I love the overcoming overspending Instagram handle, which I will also link in the show notes. And then you also have a free masterclass called why you Impulse Shop and how to Stop.

Speaker 1:

Yes, that's a really good place to start. If what we talked about today resonated with you, because I'll just kind of give you a little insight into that that masterclass is really where we kind of dive into the first two phases that we talked about today. We really dive into mindset and emotions. So if what we talked about today resonated with you, start with that masterclass. It's completely free, and I also share a lot about overcoming overspending at the end so you can kind of see if you feel like overcoming overspending is a good fit for you. But that's a great place to start as well.

Speaker 2:

I love that. What great resources. And, like I said, I'm going to have people to send to you because I know just in my own friend group I may sign up. I don't know, we'll see if my fake shopping holds me off long enough, I know.

Speaker 1:

I know.

Speaker 2:

It is such a valuable service that you are offering to people and it is so needed. And with this, I don't see anything ending soon with the links and shopping pages and the Amazon storefront. So I feel like there's just going to be more and more people that need to kind of get this under control. So thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with us here today. On the Money, on the Women's Money Wisdom Podcast, we are so happy to have you here as a guest page.

Speaker 1:

Thanks, melissa, for having me. This was great.

Speaker 2:

Yay, I'm so. I'm sorry, I was a little distracted by the leaf lower. You really couldn't hear that.

Speaker 1:

No.

Speaker 2:

I think there's like 20 landscape people at my neighbor's house just like roaming around on.

Speaker 1:

It's okay, honestly, like I have that happen all the time because my office is like right in front of me, is like the front of our house. I cannot tell you how many times I've been on like an interview or like a podcast for my own podcast or like whatever, and it's like, just like yeah, no, it has happened.

Speaker 2:

It seems to always happen, like when I have something, the rest of the day it's silent.

Speaker 1:

I will tell you, though, just to give you like peace of mind, is like, whatever happens to me, I will always ask my guests. I'm like, can you hear that? And my guest is always like no, I don't hear anything, and like for you. I'm like I really couldn't hear anything. So like I know it's like it's so loud to us, but I guess the microphones do a good job of keeping it out, because I didn't hear a thing.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, and I also do have like the note like background noise canceling when I process it. So I think that helps. I actually have it on now, so I'm hopeful. I know at least when you're talking I can mute myself when I edit, so that it won't be. It might just be a monologue with you. We'll see.

Speaker 2:

No, trust me, you really can't hear anything, so yeah, I'm going to try and get this edited and out Tuesday for our next episode because I'm so excited about it. And two, I just think it's so timely right now because everybody I'm talking to is talking about spending and holiday spending.

Speaker 2:

So I will send you. I have the pictures you sent me. Thank you so much. In the Google file I will likely get everything done either over the weekend or Monday and I'll email you, do you need? Do you want to hear an edited version before it goes live?

Speaker 1:

No, are you okay? No, yeah, no, no, no. Just whatever you want, whatever you want to put out, just put out. I'm totally fine. You don't have to send it to me.

Speaker 2:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

And I have all these. I appreciate you offering, but yeah, okay.

Speaker 2:

Well, I always ask because I mean I do chop things up, mostly to cut out my speaking time because I get like on a tangent. But yeah, I'm totally willing to do that. But it's like I said, I'd love to get it turned around and out on Tuesday and I'll share the links with you and yeah, I have somebody outside of the podcast? What is your preferred method? So like I give them? Do you prefer a DM on Instagram or an email for like clients and that kind of thing?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'll give you my email. Just have people email hello at pagepurchardcom. That's a good email address and, yeah, feel free to give that out like to any of your clients if you feel like somebody, if you have somebody that wants to like, reach out to me directly or anything like that. That's a good email address, so they're more than welcome to email me.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I just. I. Sometimes people it depends like aren't Instagram people, so I feel like an email is always good. I will send both and that way they can decide if they want to check you out. But I already have people in mind. So I'm definitely going to be sending your way, and I'm so excited about this.

Speaker 1:

Yeah Well, I appreciate you having me on. Seriously, this was so fun.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Well, if you think of anything after, just email me like if there's any other links or anything but other than that. Look for an email from me on Monday with our social media stuff, and if you want to share it, that's great. And I'll tell you in my stories and promoting it, and then we'll go from there.

Speaker 1:

But thank you so much Okay, thank you. We'll talk soon, bye, bye.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Melissa Joy, CFP

Co-host